Friday, August 14, 2015

How To Have A Bad Day

It's been a bad week. Worse than normal. Monday through Wednesday I had a personal pity party. Here's how to have a really crappy day(s):

It first starts with a Jury Summons in the mail. Good grief, that piece of paper is annoying.

You drive downtown, which is always fun. The exit you're supposed to take is under construction, so you find yourself directed onto another freeway. You say lots of prayers. Out loud. And weave around downtown until you find the Courthouse.

You notice a convenient parking lot across the street. So, you pull in to take a look.
A man knocks on your window giving you his parking pass. He's paid for the space for the entire day and he's leaving early. You count your blessings and full uber lucky to this man. You park in his spot.

Jury Evaluation takes for-ev-er. Because, it just does. And count your lucky stars, you get picked to be on the jury. Good gracious, my insides were crying when that happened. You watch all the other lucky humans leave who didn't get picked.

At the end of the long, boring day, you walk to your car.
Only to find a boot on your tire and a Warning sticker that you didn't pay for the parking spot.
Time stands still and you just have a moment. Right there in downtown Houston.

You call the Boot Company and it takes them 25 minutes to get to you.
You explain, "The space was paid for. That gentleman was being so nice. I don't understand."
Boot man is patient, even when I grab his arm and start jumping up and down with dramatics. And then he takes the time to explain why I'm naive. Super.

He then tells me that I owe $133.25 to get the Boot removed. After catching my breath, I told him he'd have to call The Husband to let him know. He declined. And also tells me I should be grateful my car didn't get towed. Awesomeness. I wonder to myself if the $6 a day jury payment will cover this enormous parking charge.

He swipes my card and I'm on my way into the rush hour traffic of Houston.
20 minutes later, each of my kids is calling me with some kind of complaint. By the time Child #2 calls because she's mad at her dad, I lose it. I start crying.
Child #2 gets all sorts of alarmed and can't figure out how to get me to stop. She finally tells me that I probably just need to go to bed.

Dinner and chocolate calmed me down some.
Just slightly.
Because I still had to go back for the next 2 days. It was grueling.
But this time, I made The Husband drive me. My parking days are over.

Saturday, August 8, 2015

Something To Make

You know me. I redecorate my mantel often. Sometimes it stays for a while, but rarely. I usually switch it up every few weeks. Here's what we've got for August:

Do you see that clothespin wreath? Isn't it adorable?!
You can find the original and the directions HERE.
You must make it. Really. It took me about 45 minutes. And just an FYI- it's heavy. Hang with care.

Enjoy your weekend.
Be creative :)

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Stuff On A Wednesday

1. We had Sister's Day. It was August 1st. It's our family tradition we started long ago to celebrate the beauty of having sisters. This is the first time it's fallen on a Saturday, so we let The Dad join us. Sister's Day turned into Family Day. Which is always my favorite way to spend time. We went to lunch and then a movie. Just the 5 of us. Together. The best.

And just an FYI- Child #1 cut off 15 inches of her hair. Now she looks like a preppy college girl.

2. Child #2 is now an official driver. Technically she's been driving for years. Now we just get to pay more for our car insurance.

3. I had one major goal this summer. To create a family art project. It's something I've wanted to do for years, and I finally bribed/threatened/begged everyone to cooperate.

I bought a huge frame from Goodwill and painted it. Then I purchased watercolor poster board/paper from Hobby Lobby and cut it to the size of the frame. I used a ruler to mark off the grid.

Each family member was assigned a time to paint squares. There were no rules, except to use the paint colors I had picked out. Once everyone was finished, I filled in the remaining open spots. It's now my favorite piece of art in the house.

4. I've been walking in the mornings. Every summer I get this idea that I need to get it together and be more active. So, I walk. During the hottest months of the year. It makes no sense.

Every morning I pass this tree.

It's losing it's leaves. In the middle of summer. It's got the seasons all mixed up. Leaves aren't supposed to fall until, you know, Fall.

I can't help but compare myself to this tree. I feel like I'm always doing things in the wrong order, usually at the wrong time. The opposite of normal. Do you ever feel that way? That the world is moving to a rhythm that you just can't seem to match?

Most of the time I count it off as just me being abnormally strange. But every morning when I look at this tree, I wonder if it really even matters. So what if it's losing it's leaves in the wrong season. It's still a beautiful tree doing it's thing right along with all the others.

And so I wonder if doing your own thing, no matter the season, really is what it's all about. Regardless of those around us. We're still our own beauty. Maybe more so because we're going against the grain. Weird is the new normal. At least I believe it is.

Let's learn a lesson from the leaf-falling tree. Be who you are. No matter what surrounds you. Now matter what the world tells you. Do your thing and be uniquely beautiful.

Words to remember.

Happy random Wednesday, friends.

Friday, July 24, 2015

One Of The Best On The List

There are a few traditions we keep on our Summer Bucket List. And this is one of them.

Here's how it works...

You start with awesome friends who dreamed up this awesome tradition. (Myer's whoot whoot!)

You gather your people and drive to IKEA.

You eat meatballs. Because, duh. They're delicious.

Then you unleash the teenagers into the store.

To play hide and seek.

And then you shop.

If you happen to notice any of the children hiding in a cabinet, you ignore them and move on.

Once you're standing at the cash register with all your goods, you text them.

They meet you at the car.

Bam. Best. Summer. Fun. Ever.

P.S. They've only gotten caught by an employee once :)

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

For When Your Sister Is Awesome

My sister and I have a sort of "division of labor" between us. Here's how it works: I cook dinner and she pretty much does everything else. It's the greatest set up. I recommend you try it.

Because my kids have come to the conclusion that she's responsible for their entertainment. I'm not quite sure how it happened, but it's genius. Whenever my kids are bored, they text her and start begging to do stuff. Clearly they know they can't come to me for a solution. I'm probably too busy with something. Like, sitting.

The Sister decided to have a Experiment Day. It took hours. For the love, I was all by myself at home. Seriously, this is adding up to be a great summer.

Having an awesome sister is, well, awesome.
And no, you can't have her.

Sunday, July 19, 2015

The Blessing of Teeth

First, can we just talk about how mad she's going to be that I've posted this picture? There's going to be a fall out, I'm sure of it.

Wisdom teeth came out this week. I feel like I've been a nurse for the last few days. Or that I'm taking care of a newborn again. Round the clock meds and feedings.

She was convinced she wouldn't say or do anything funny after coming out of anesthesia. Oh, was she wrong. I had to stop the car twice and film her because I was laughing so hard. And she would Not. Stop. Talking. She thought the car's dashboard was snake skin because "it has pretty scales". She also kept telling me her face felt "all squishy".

The real problem was her uvula. She kept trying to stick her finger in her mouth to touch it. She was convinced it was bleeding. I had to keep pulling her hand out and explaining that her teeth were bleeding, not her uvula. After the third go around of this, she got really mad and feisty with me. Once we were home, she called her sisters all kinds of interesting names. It was literally hysterical.

But here's the flip side-- she's been home. With me. Laying on the couch. All day. Normally this house serves as more of a hotel she just sleeps in. I rarely see her. But for the last 5 days, I've had her all to myself. And I've taken care of her. I haven't had to do that in years. In the weirdest way, I've loved it.

So, I thank you wisdom teeth. For giving me my daughter for the week. And providing the best entertainment I've had in months. And just so you know, she really wanted to keep you. After surgery she kept asking to hold you and look at you. Anesthesia is the greatest.


Monday, July 13, 2015

A Double Cake And A Hermit

OK, listen. The picture doesn't do this justice. At all. This is a cake recipe that has been doubled. Why? Because I'm a genius and why not double a chocolate cake? But then, I was in a hurry. Why again? Because I had to DYE MY HAIR BEFORE CHURCH, good heavens! And so, maybe, in my haste, I forgot all the flour. You know, that ingredient that holds everything together. Yah, that one. 20 minutes into baking at 350 degrees and the entire thing exploded all over the oven. Like, literally, exploded. Or, bubbled up and over everything.

I opened the oven and just starred at it for a while. Then I walked away hoping a fairy would clean it up. No go. Then I almost started crying while I scraped every stinkin' surface of that oven. 2 of the children came to gawk at the situation and then left. Child #1 had mercy in her heart and stayed to help clean. She's now the favorite. Forever.

After it was all made right again, I made another cake. Because honestly, what good is a Sunday dinner without a chocolate cake? Am I right? This time, the Forever Favorite Child made sure I included all the ingredients. Hallelujah. The day was saved.


I've had something on my mind lately. And I just have to ask. OK? Because I'm curious and I'm also worried I'm weirder than I already suspect. So hear me out.

I'm an Introvert.

I think.

I love talking to people. Truth. I'm wildly entertaining to be with. Another truth. But reality? I never want to go anywhere. Ever. I just want to stay home and do my thing. The Husband may, or may not, have started calling me a hermit. And I'm totally not offended. It's a backwards compliment.

It all started once I turned 40. Since then I really can't find any enthusiasm for going out. Home is where it's at for me. Parties? Sheesh, can't stand them. But once I actually go? Because I'm married to an uber social butterfly? I have fun. Because remember, I love talking to people. So, I just don't know what my problem is.

I've decided it's an age thing. Am I right? Chime in if you're over 40. Do you hate going out too? Or is it just me. Maybe it's me. OK, it's probably only me. For reals. I'm a walking "situation". I should get out more, but hey, that takes way too much energy. I'd rather stay home and do a puzzle. I'm terrible. Or maybe I'm really 84 instead of 44.

I'm going to eat my feelings with some chocolate cake.

Happy Monday.